Hi it's Texino, and it has been a while since I spoke about my nemesis on
the hard court, Mr. William S. Monroe. Now I've never made it plain how
"Bill" became such a lion with the round ball because I don't know, but he
surely was and I battled him many a time in the school yards and gymnasiums
half way around this world. I couldn't beat him either. Oh I might score
more points, but then he would call the game a draw cause he had to go play
his mandolin some place. I'm sure most people here know that Mr. Monroe was in a band and they played professionally. Well you can read about that in books, but this tells another side to the man.
There are some who say that Monroe would take advantage of a situation just
to come out on top. I'll just say he was clever and leave it there. Last
time I shot hoops with Bill was outside the Station Inn. I was there with
two gals and like most nights back then I was a bit the worse for drink.
Well Bill had showed up with a beautiful young woman in tow. Right when I
got there he was climbing up on the stage and I could tell from his
countenance that he was going to rip into a real barn burner. Then he seen
me and suddenly he got all droopy looking and sang two slow songs about
being an old man in misery and all that. Then he sits down and looks over
to me like he just noticed that I'm in the audience. He nods his head and I
nod back and he gives me this "you and me outside" sign. Well, like I said
I'm about drunk and I figure if he wants to fight what the hell? I'm a
trained boxer, but then, I'm not stupid so I decide I'll back out some way
because pounding a legend of country music in a nashville parking lot won't
look good on my resume'.
So I follow him outside and he's gone over the the rear end of some big car.
He pokes at something and suddenly the whole rear opens up and a regulation
basket ball hoop unfolds. I stand there with my mouth open an the next
thing I known Bill whips one of those old style ABA balls at me. You know
the ones that are red white and blue. "One on one" he says, "let's go cause
I got a date." I'm stating to clear up and tap the ball back to him.
Bill makes a move to cut around so I try to knock his hat off. No good,
some kind of hat cement I reckon. He had all the tricks common to KY
Basketball: Boot lifters, knee springers, finger extensions, slippery Rayon
suit; I think I mentioned hat cement already. It's not cheating; it's just
the way hillbillies play ball.
We run around that dusty parking lot with him charging from the shadows and
into the sodium lights like some great spectacular bird just beating the
nightlights out of me till I had enough and when he come by for a layup I
grabed his legs and jumped with him. That jump raised old Bill so tall that
he got his hat jammed in the hoop and with the super cement he had employed
and there he stayed. Well I dropped to the ground but I must of tripped a
wire or something because the whole hoop device swollowed back up in that
big ride taking Bill Monroe, the daddy of BG with it. I had sobered up a
good bit as a hard session of one on one B-Ball has that effect, plus my
thoughts were starting to form a man slaughter defense, when I hear old Bill
raging from the inside the trunk of that vehicle.
Now, if you ever been to the emergency room of a hospital you probably
notice that there are a lot of foreign physicians at work and you might get
the idea that everyone from Central America is an MD. Well you would be
about right because medicine is a core subject in our schools from the 3rd
grade through 12th and by the time you get out of high school you can go
right into med school if you want. Not everyone does of course but lots do
because it's a good way to earn extra $. In fact, I'm a doctor but I have
not practiced since 2000. The point I make is from the noise that Mr.
Monroe is making, I know that his airway is not compromised and from what he
is saying I deduce he is just stuck by his hat and not in any real danger.
So I go back in side an I see Bill's date has got his keys. She looks ar me,
taking in my dirty disheveled appearance and says "Stuck in the hoop again?"
I nod and say "in the car too". She says, "Can you hear him callin"? I say
yes and she points out that my dates have left me. Then she says "You might
want to be somewhere down the road when I let him out." I say OK and she
gives me a telephone # to call if I need help. I notice it's my number but I
just say thanks and walk out.
Texino
Talking about Bill
Lyons CO
Hi it's Texino, and it has been a while since I spoke about my nemesis on
the hard court, Mr. William S. Monroe. Now I've never made it plain how
"Bill" became such a lion with the round ball because I don't know, but he
surely was and I battled him many a time in the school yards and gymnasiums half way around this world. I couldn't beat him either. Oh I might score more points, but then he would call the game a draw cause he had to go play his mandolin some place. I'm sure most people here know that Mr. Monroe was in a band and they played professionally. Well you can read about that in books, but this tells another side to the man.
There are some who say that Monroe would take advantage of a situation just
to come out on top. I'll just say he was clever and leave it there. Last
time I shot hoops with Bill was outside the Station Inn. I was there with
two gals and like most nights back then I was a bit the worse for drink.
Well Bill had showed up with a beautiful young woman in tow. Right when I
got there he was climbing up on the stage and I could tell from his
countenance that he was going to rip into a real barn burner. Then he seen
me and suddenly he got all droopy looking and sang two slow songs about
being an old man in misery and all that. Then he sits down and looks over
to me like he just noticed that I'm in the audience. He nods his head and I
nod back and he gives me this "you and me outside" sign. Well, like I said
I'm about drunk and I figure if he wants to fight what the hell? I'm a
trained boxer, but then, I'm not stupid so I decide I'll back out some way
because pounding a legend of country music in a nashville parking lot won't
look good on my resume'.
So I follow him outside and he's gone over the the rear end of some big car.
He pokes at something and suddenly the whole rear opens up and a regulation
basket ball hoop unfolds. I stand there with my mouth open an the next
thing I known Bill whips one of those old style ABA balls at me. You know
the ones that are red white and blue. "One on one" he says, "let's go cause
I got a date." I'm stating to clear up and tap the ball back to him.
Bill makes a move to cut around so I try to knock his hat off. No good,
some kind of hat cement I reckon. He had all the tricks common to KY
Basketball: Boot lifters, knee springers, finger extensions, slippery Rayon
suit; I think I mentioned hat cement already. It's not cheating; it's just
the way hillbillies play ball.
We run around that dusty parking lot with him charging from the shadows and
into the sodium lights like some great spectacular bird just beating the
nightlights out of me till I had enough and when he come by for a layup I
grabed his legs and jumped with him. That jump raised old Bill so tall that
he got his hat jammed in the hoop and with the super cement he had employed
and there he stayed. Well I dropped to the ground but I must of tripped a
wire or something because the whole hoop device swollowed back up in that
big ride taking Bill Monroe, the daddy of BG with it. I had sobered up a
good bit as a hard session of one on one B-Ball has that effect, plus my
thoughts were starting to form a man slaughter defense, when I hear old Bill
raging from the inside the trunk of that vehicle.
Now, if you ever been to the emergency room of a hospital you probably
notice that there are a lot of foreign physicians at work and you might get
the idea that everyone from Central America is an MD. Well you would be
about right because medicine is a core subject in our schools from the 3rd
grade through 12th and by the time you get out of high school you can go
right into med school if you want. Not everyone does of course but lots do
because it's a good way to earn extra $. In fact, I'm a doctor but I have
not practiced since 2000. The point I make is from the noise that Mr.
Monroe is making, I know that his airway is not compromised and from what he is saying, I deduce he is just stuck by his hat and not in any real danger.
So I go back in side an I see Bill's date has got his keys. She looks at me,
taking in my dirty disheveled appearance and says "Stuck in the hoop again?"
I nod and say "in the car too". She says, "Can you hear him callin"? I say
yes and she points out that my dates have left me. Then she says "You might
want to be somewhere down the road when I let him out." I say OK and she
gives me a telephone # to call if I ever need help. I notice it's my number but I just say thanks and walk out.
Texino
Talking about Bill
Lyons CO
